“Why bother?”
I often hear that when I coach employees, managers, and executives in the workplace, many of whom feel as if they are drowning in a sea of ineptitude, with no support lifeline in sight. It usually starts with one bad experience: they ask for something that they need to get their job done and then get rebuffed — or worse — chewed out — in response. The slide to “why bother” begins.
There’s a way to avoid the “why bother” cycle. You can ask for what you need and increase the likelihood that you’ll get it by following these simple guidelines:
- Know exactly what you need and why. Think it through. If you need to hire another employee, what is the return on investment? Can the need be met in other ways? Be able to justify the expense and think through the possible challenges you might get when you present your request. This goes for the smaller things too. A replacement laptop? What’s wrong with the one you have? You’re not scheduled to get another one yet. Why now? It’s not in the budget. Prepare a list of specific reasons to support your request — and provide evidence that this will support your department’s or organization’s goals. Is there another solution that will work?
- Get the details. How much is this going to cost? When? What vendor? Who is going to spend the time on this? All of this matters. Have the answers ready and be prepared for pushback.
- Timing is everything. Asking for something costly immediately after a bleak quarterly report is not the best time to ask. During the budget cycle may be a good time unless everyone has been told that there are significant cutbacks coming. You need to gauge the tenor of the office and the company and decide when it’s best to ask.
- Ask the right person. You don’t want to go over the heads of your immediate supervisors but you may want to ask them who the right people to talk with are so that you have permission to go above or around them. Find out who makes the decisions and get there without stepping on toes.
- Be aware of the politics. (See step 4 above.)
- Ask nicely. Don’t demand. Don’t argue. Remember what your mother always said — “You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.” Ok, so that’s a stupid saying, but it’s true. People like to do things for nice people. The only reason people do things for nasty people is to get rid of them. And they resent doing it. Find out what you can do for the person in return. If they do something for you, thank them somehow — let them know that you appreciate it will make their day — and be more likely to help you out next time.
- Listen, listen, listen, and ask questions. When the person you ask has objections, listen to the objections and ask questions about them. What would you need to do to overcome the objections? Under what conditions would you be able to get what you need? And really listen to the answers. Don’t argue! See number 6. Who else needs to be involved in the decision? What other information is needed?
- Be patient but persistent. Sometimes it takes several tries. You may need to return with more information. Continue to work with the person. They need to know that you’re serious and you need to provide the right information and counter any objections they have.
- And one final piece of advice – you may not be the best person to be asking. Someone else may have more clout or be able to call in favors. If they do, remember to thank them.
Most of us aren’t trained psychologists. But many of us would welcome the opportunity to learn from the insights psychologists have into human behavior — particularly when it comes to our jobs and the people we work with. Especially if those insights were provided in language that a layperson can understand in a well-organized format that’s easy to use and readily accessible from any computer screen.